Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Ditch the Mama Guilt

Posted by Arvi on Wednesday, June 18, 2014
I have been working for nearly a decade now. Two companies, almost two years in the first one, and I'm on my 6th year here in my current office with only 2 or 3 months of unemployment in between. In case you're not familiar with what I do, I work as a designer in an architecture and interior design company. In our industry, regardless if we are designing residential houses, offices, commercial spaces, etc., all have something common. It's the flexibility and the long working hours needed to complete a certain project. In my previous job, I have experienced staying in the office for two-three days straight to finish a project presentation. But things are better where I am currently working, our company encourages maximizing our office hours instead of rendering overtime work. But as I have mentioned, our industry goes hand in hand with the need for extended work hours so there are days that I still need to stay a little longer just to get things done.

If you are unattached, single, in a relationship or even married without children, your time is pretty much your own. So working in the office until late at night or until the wee hours of the morning even, is really okay as long as you're able and and willing. But when you become a Mama, a baby enters the picture, then poof! Every second will count. Literally. And when the seconds add up to minutes, hours or even days for some, that's when the guilt starts. The guilt doubles up if you're coming home late not because of work, but because of some leisure time with your husband or with your friends. Trust me. I know how anxiety can get to you in the middle of a movie, or in the middle of a good conversation with your friends. It sneaks from below your spine up to the back of your neck. It will even give you goosebumps some times.

But here I am now, having a hot cup of hibiscus tea and a plate of sticky cinnamon bun while waiting for Mr. T to come off of work. I could have gone home earlier but since it's raining, traffic's bad for sure. I'm not that brave to commute at this time. Instead, I'm going to spend the next hour blogging and reading. Do I feel guilty? No.

Internet, hear me. I'm not guilty. Lol. :P

Ok, sometimes I still do feel guilty but not as much as before. And I know Mr. T has completely different views about this, he already knows that going home an hour or two later than usual is already ok. No need to beat ourselves up for it, just make the most out of it. After reading more about attachment parenting, I have come to realize that spending most (if not all) of my time and energy with and for my daughter brings no balance to my personal and our family life. I have to make time for my husband, myself and other things too. In order for me to do this, I needed to do some changes and I am sharing some of them to you.

Fambam Hits: Commune

Posted by Arvi on Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Without the baby for today.

Mr. T and I don't get to spend lunch together that much even if our offices are just three buildings away because either one or both of us are too swamped with work. But last Thursday, Mr. T asked me out for lunch. :)

Instead of going to Pacific Star, I thought we could take advantage of these lunch dates and check out different places around our area. And on top of my list was Commune.

Commune is located at Liberty Plaza. corner of Dela Costa and Valero. If you're familiar with the area, it is where Binalot used to be. Commune is apparently a sister company of Binalot.


A Secret Love

Posted by Arvi on Wednesday, October 23, 2013
All men be like..
My wife got sick. She was constantly nervous because of problems at work, personal life, her failures and problems with children. She has lost 30 pounds and weighted about 90 pounds in her 35 years.

She got very skinny, and was constantly crying. She was not a happy woman. She had suffered from continuing headaches, heart pain and jammed nerves in her back and ribs. She did not sleep well, falling asleep only in the morning and got tired very quickly during the day.

Our relationship was on the verge of break up. Her beauty was leaving her somewhere, she had bags under her eyes, she was poking her head, and stopped taking care of herself. She refused to shoot the films and rejected any role. I lost hope and thought that we’ll get divorced soon.

But then I decided to act on it. After all, I've got the most beautiful woman on the earth. She is the ideal of more than half of men and women on earth, and I was the one allowed to fall asleep next to her and to hug her shoulders. I began to pepper her with flowers, kisses and complements. I surprised her and pleased every minute. I gave her lots of gifts and lived just for her. I spoke in public only about her. I incorporated all themes in her direction. I praised her in front of her own and our mutual friends.

You won’t believe, but she has blossomed. She became even better than before. She gained weight, was no longer nervous and she loved me even more than ever. I had no clue that she CAN love that much.

And then I realized one thing: “The woman is the reflection of her man!”

This short essay started circulating around emails and Facebook a while back. Some said it was written by Brad Pitt but turned out untrue, leaving the author still unknown up to this date.

It was short and sweet but all men should take notes from this.

Ezio Turned One

Posted by Arvi on Sunday, September 01, 2013
Oh wow, less than a month since my blog went online and I'm already delayed with my posts. Ha! :P But always better than nothing, eh? :D

We braved the looming wrath of Typhoon Maring before it hit the metro a couple of weeks ago to attend Ezio's first birthday party. :) Ezio is the first born of EF and Shiela, our friends from college. Didn't realize that we've known each other for more than 10 years already. From our inuman whatevers, here we are now, attending each other's weddings, baby christenings and now birthday parties. Ayayay, how time flies.

Sharing some photos from the party. :)