Things You Don't Say/Ask to a Breastfeeding Mama

Posted by Arvi on Tuesday, June 03, 2014
Yes, in case you have missed it, my darling daughter is now 19 months and still breastfeeding. :) It's one of the best choices we have made as first-time parents. We know we are providing the best for our daughter.

I remember when I first watched the movie Grownups, we weren't married yet. It was the scene when the group reunited for the first time at the coach's funeral. They were seating in a gazebo chatting when Kevin James' son walked up to the mom and asked to breastfeed. The group was taken aback, someone asked how old the boy was and Kevin James responded, 48 months, trying to downplay the age. Then the couple went defensive and explained that they're trying to wean him already.

That was a funny scene, or back then I thought it was.

Fast-forward to today, I am now a Mama to my beautiful daughter, and we are breastfeeding. I have learned a lot about the importance of breastfeeding not only during the first 6 months of a baby's life but also extended breastfeeding for a toddler. Anyway you look at it, breast milk is still superior to any other kind of milk being offered in the market.

See, here in our country, it is just recently that breastfeeding is really breaking through. Years before, milk formula companies together with their marketing ploys and ads did a great job at making people think that formula milk is as good as breast milk. Packed with vitamins and nutrients that they have studied that are supposed to be similar to what a child gets from breast milk. Before I got pregnant, I didn't know formula milk was all that bad, we even tried giving Ava formula milk before when I was about to go back to work just in case I don't get to meet her daily milk requirements by pumping. She was around 3 months then, and that was the only thing I regret doing as a parent. I was so misinformed.

Breastfeeding in public is still not a norm here, I've gotten weird looks, disgusted looks, manyak looks, you name it, I've seen it. You get more of these looks when your baby suddenly decided that she doesn't want to be under a nursing cover anymore and arguing is just pointless, you'll still end up ditching the cover by five or six months. So by the time your baby becomes a toddler, you are already a ninja Mama when it comes to breastfeeding.

Aside from the looks, you'll also get comments, not only from strangers mind you. But also from family members and friends! So I've come up with a list of annoying things that were asked or said to me when people see me breastfeeding my toddler. Family and friends, read on! Lol! So you won't tell nor ask me these things anymore. :P

Things You Don't Say/Ask to a Breastfeeding Mama
1. "May gatas ka pa?" (You still have breastmilk?)
Yes people, I do. A woman's body will continue to produce milk for as long as a baby latches on her breasts. It's a supply and demand thing. Even after weaning, milk production will still continue and just gradually stop once it recognizes that there is no need for milk anymore.
2. "Wala ng sustansiya yan." (There's no nutritional value in your milk anymore.)
I wonder how people know that? Lol. Breast milk does not lose it's nutritional value, ever. The nutrients and quality of your breast milk actually varies and adjusts to your child's needs.
3. "Mag-formula ka na." (Start giving formula already.)
Thanks, but no thanks. We've made ourselves aware of our decision to breastfeed until Ava's decided to wean on her own and along the way we have learned a lot about what those formula milks are made of. GMOs, unidentified machine parts and more.
4. "Kulang na yung milk mo, pumayat na siya." (Your milk is not enough, she's trimmed down already.)
FYI, ever since Ava was born, her weight has always been at the upper percentile range (between 90-95). It means that she weighs more than 90-95% of the babies her age. Even now that she's trimmed down a little, she's still in the upper percentile because she gains weight every month. And why is it that bigger babies are healthy but in adults it's the other way around? Society is weird. Chubby babies are not always healthier than smaller babies. Even if I am a Mama to a chunky, healthy and delicious baby, I don't look at her smaller peers less. As long as your baby is happy, healthy, thriving and reaches developmental milestones on time, baby should be just fine.
5. "Baby, tama na yan. Big ka na." (Baby, stop breastfeeding. You're big already)
My daughter is just 19 months old. She's still a baby! Ever heard of "Breast milk is still best for babies up to two years"? And even beyond that we still plan to continue. Learn about the benefits of extended breastfeeding.

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While I get all those nasty looks and comments on the side, I really don't mind because I get support a hundred times more. It's really good that our society is getting more aware about the greatness of breastfeeding but it will still take a while to completely get rid of the discrimination. Mean time, here's my share in spreading that awareness. So the next time you encounter a Mama breastfeeding not only a toddler, but her baby as well, you'll know the questions not to ask.

2 comments:

  1. I am a 57-year old father of 4 grown ups(no apo yet) but still excited to read items like this. Especially when written very nicely.(underrated description) like-na-like. Thanks a lot Mrs T.

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    1. Thank you Mr. for your comment. But I do hope that next time you come by you can put your name so I can address you better. :)

      It's nice to know a topic like this interests you. I'm pretty sure you'll be a very supportive and wonderful Lolo just like my Papa and my Papa-in-law. :)

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